Feeling Melancholy on This Sunday Evening

bycommonconsent.com

“You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what's a life, anyway? We're born, we live a little while, we die. A spider's life can't help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone's life can stand a little of that.” 

― E.B. White, Charlotte's Web

This is one of my very favorite quotes, and it always reminds me of some people who are quite important to me. It also reminds me of a friend, or two, I have lost.

It has such a melancholy feel to me, bittersweet, but very tender, and warm. Friendship is warmth, provides warmth, doesn’t it? 

For several reasons, I have called this quote to mind recently.

What is your favorite quote, friendship or not?

Questioning My Taste in Music, Are You?

This Sunday music meme is courtesy of Sunday Stealing by Kwisgiver. 

1. Which bands/artists do you own the most albums by? In my move here recently, I came across my box of old albums. So cool. Flipping through, I have the most albums by The Rolling Stones, The Eagles, and Genesis.
2. What was the last song you listened to? These Are Days by 10,000 Maniac.
3. What’s in your CD player right now? Nothing. We usually hook up my husband’s phone to the stereo system. He has the best playlists of anyone I know!
4. What was the last show you attended? Spoon at The Chicago Theater. A few weeks before that, I saw Natalie Merchant at the same venue.
5. What was the greatest show you’ve ever been to? Probably the first concert I ever attended. Probably because it was my first and it was HUGE. The Rolling Stones at Solider Field in 1978. Journey was one of the four opening acts of this all day affair.
6. What’s the worst show you’ve ever been to? I was really looking forward to seeing Prince at the United Center a few years ago. It was horrible! So unfortunate because I am a huge fan.
7. What’s the most musically involved you’ve ever been? I’m not sure I understand this question. You mean like karaoke? 
8. What show are you looking forward to? I am looking forward to seeing Nick Walenda walk a tightrope across the Chicago River without a safety harness tomorrow night. As far as concerts, I would love to see Bob Seger who is playing locally in December and I have added this to my pre-Christmas list.
9. What is you favorite band shirt? For my fiftieth birthday, my girlfriends gave me a custom bikini made out of a vintage Stones tee shirt. You know, the one with the big red tongue. The had the artist put the tongue on the butt cheeks instead of the front. I have only worn it a few times under private circumstances. I’ll see if I can find it and post a picture (not on!).
10. What musician would you like to hang out with for a day? Off the top of my head, Keith Richards.
11. Who is one musician or group you wish would make a comeback? Ummmmm…I’ll get back to you.
12. Who is one band/artist you’ve never seen live but always wanted to? John Lennon.
13. What was your last musical “phase” before you wisened up? I like what I like so I would never wisen up.
14. How many music related videos/DVDs do you own? I can count them on one hand.
15. How many concerts/shows have you been to, total? I don’t have enough fingers or toes to count them all. I have been fortunate to live in a city where tours constantly come through.
16. What’s your “guilty pleasure” that you hate to admit to liking? I don’t hate to admit it, but my “guilty pleasure” is definitely Kid Rock. So naughty! So good! So fun!!!
17. What is your favorite movie soundtrack? I liked the quiet soundtrack of one of my all time favorite movies, The Way We Were. I also liked the one from Remember the Titans. I could probably come up with more if I had the time.

SOCS: Dealing, My Way (With Anybody and Anything)

Wow! It’s been a long time. My fingers haven’t typed at this keyboard, sitting in my study, in weeks. I have no concrete reason or excuse except to admit I haven’t “felt” like it.

But it is Sunday and Sundays are my second favorite day of the week and in celebration of this fact and to put something down on paper before I bask in the very first day it has felt like Springtime in Chicago, Jana offered up a stream of consciousness (five minutes to type then immediately press “publish”) prompt of:

Dealing (with anything and anybody)

Oh BOY, has this changed over the years.

I remember being a young, gainfully employed adult, then young mother, and trying to control absolutely everything I came in contact with and I mean EVERYTHING. I thought if I did, I could determine (okay, force) a suitable outcome, which definitely translated into the one I wanted. It worked about 50% of the time (most likely with the same probability as accompanied by my extraordinary measures). The interesting thing about this approach is that I was almost always 100% stressed out. With worry. With pending disappointment.  With exhaustion.

A quick decision maker by nature, and very impulsive, I make mistakes continually throughout any given day. I am the first person to admit I’m incredibly and undeniably imperfect. I feel a certain amount weight lifted being able to acknowledge this.

But thinking about my approach to dealing this morning and being a gazillion years older than that young, naïve mother, I realize that control is almost one of the very last things I desire or need. In fact, I almost hate the feeling I get from forcing something. And who wants something you have to "force" anyway (and there is a difference between making something happen by working for it and using force to produce it especially against another's will, in my opinion).

I find much more peace from sleeping on things (decisions and issues!!!), reducing my expectations of others AND going easier on myself. I am the only person I can control. Maybe not my scattered thoughts so much but how I react or act on them.

I can’t control, nor would I want to, anyone else. Because I never want to make anyone do anything that they don’t want in their own heart.

Be YOU! Let me be ME! If we like each other, YEA!!!

It sounds so hands off but it makes it easier for me to close my eyes at night (who am I kidding; I never sleep anyway).

SOCSunday: Tired. Lazy. Crabby.

Sunday stream of consciousness at Jana’s Thinking Place is going on right at this very minute. There is an optional prompt of which I am opting out. It has taken me hours just to walk from the family room to the computer and type for five minutes.

The rules are five minutes, leave it alone, push publish. Here goes:

Not only am I having a “fat” day (hate this feeling), I am extremely tired, incredibly lazy and quite possibly intensely crabby (you know what you know….). I don’t intend to ask anyone for confirmation on any of those adjectives particularly with regard to my mood, but no one’s really talking to me anyway as of yet. It is 1:30. Do you think I did something or am I giving off the “vibe”?

Last night was P!NK!!!!! It was the most incredible concert experience I’ve ever had the privilege of spectating and I’ve spectated a lot of experiences (spellchecker is hating all over my use of this word. It is a word, isn’t it?). Wow! She draws a very homogenous crowd and it provided for quality people watching which besides seeing P!NK is one of my most favorite things to do.

You’d think standing and dancing for two hours straight burned enough calories (should Google that actually. Must be hundreds, right?) and that I should be able to eat anything I darn well want today.

But there’s nothing worse than feeling chubby, lazy and crabby because in that “perfect storm” the only thing you feel like doing it is eating. Because you shouldn’t be?

Cereal

Peanut Butter on a banana

A donut

Chips and salsa

Chicken tortilla soup

A bowl of salted caramel and chocolate malt ice cream (yes, two scoops)

And now someone just asked me to get out of my sweats. We are going somewhere.

I don't think sooooo.....

It is only 1:45pm.

More lazy, more crabby, more eating to do.