Today is one of those days I don’t have time to think
straight or sit in this chair to write.
Today is one of those days where I’m short on inspiration.
Today is one of those days that NaBloPoMo is made for…
The need to be away from the computer kind of day. The heart
pounding with craziness, and busyness, and excitement kind. The warmth
of touchable, flesh and blood, kind of day.
But we’ve made it two weeks (today), halfway through
blogging each and every day of November, and I’m not ready to throw in the towel
today even though I’m dying to say, “Screw it!!! I don’t have time today!!!” But I just can’t.
In an effort to make it easier, I intended to do a
quick search of Huffington Post (to which I am addicted) and resurrect an
article I’d seen a while back. Unfortunately after 15 minutes of
searching, I realized it was, just maybe, on my other favorite site, Brain
Pickings. And indeed, it was.
Candy Chang, an artist and designer, started a project in
New Orleans called “Before I Die I Want To…” She turned an abandoned house into
a giant chalkboard for people to share their thoughts anonymously.
"I never expected such an amazing outpouring of
responses so quickly. Within 24 hours, the entire wall was completely filled
out. And the responses range from humorous to overwhelmingly thoughtful — from
‘be a YouTube sensation’ to ‘go 200 mph’ to ‘be completely myself.’ I hear that
people are gathering at the house and it’s stopping traffic. I’m blown away.” ~
This sent my mind into a spin. What would I write? At first, I
was concerned my secret aspirations were coming from a fairly superficial and
seemingly self-absorbed place. Then I got to thinking, it is my life. I'd want it to be for the people I care about most. And me, too, of course. Is that shallow?
It became an international sensation and after reading a
follow-up article, I felt better about my superficial
answers brim with seeming individual simplicity which somehow unravels the
collective complexity of the human condition: World peace, curing cancer, and
learning to love might not be the most original of answers, but something
magical happens when anonymity strips us of the compulsion for originality and
lays bare our deepest, most unoriginally human and heartfelt longings with
crisp, urgent sincerity. In aggregate, they are a reminder of what truly
matters — a moral lens on what should
matter — as we face the immutable fact that one day, when we turn to look back
on our lives, all the cleverness and pretentiousness and witticism will
dissipate into dust over the burning coals of our innermost, simplest, most
earnest desires for a meaningful life.
(I love that paragraph above!!! Trueness to self is difficult, at times, considering marital and family dynamics.)
magical realization of doing this anonymously didn’t change what I would write;
it just made me feel like I could be more true to myself. Write how I really felt.
What I really wanted. It’s not something like world peace, or anything universally important,
even though I wish for those things.
I die I want to live in Italy for an extended period, splitting time between
Rome, Chianti, and the Amalfi Coast. All the people I care about would come
stay with me (separately or in small groups).
be perfectly relaxed. And laugh, talk and hug. Spend undistracted, quality time really “seeing”
each other. We’d revel in the small and important moments that make sharing time one of the most exquisite feelings on earth.