I don’t know about her, but I am pretty sure I have.
If you happened to peruse yesterday’s post about a lunch date, this is the followup, which went pretty much as expected.
[Here’s some insider info about me: When I know I am going to see someone I like, I am almost giddy with anticipation. I am excited. I can’t wait! If I know you well, be prepared for several warm hugs and, most likely, a snuggle on your cheek (I am a very affectionate person.).]
I was dragging my butt getting ready. I had a small pit in my stomach. More importantly, I felt mostly nothing.
There was a mediocre fondness upon sight. The greeting was lukewarm at best. The hug was cursory.
Upon brief glance around the apartment, she pronounced the “new love nest”, in which I have now lived for one and a half years, “wide open” and “I bet the view is nice in the summer.”
I had previously made reservations at a delectable restaurant, in part, because I didn’t want to hear her bitch then or later that the food or service sucked, which she is wont to do. We ordered a glass of wine, (Yeehaw! Man, I needed one.) and after several questions about menu items and ingredients (her's, not mine), we placed an order.
We talked about her lake house and its renovations, how difficult and exhausting it is maintaining two home (her main and lake), dermatologists, her dog and travel. [Yawn!]
She must have needed to catch her breath because she asked for an update on my kids. I briefly told her about my daughter’s new-ish job, to which she said,
“Didn’t you tell me this before Christmas?”
“Yep, I sure did.” She was listening!
I provided a one sentence synopsis of my son’s life then promptly shut up. She followed with an additional multiple minutes long overview of both her kids.
[Blogger's $.02: If you have to do a fairly major life update when you talk with someone, you are an acquaintance not a close friend.]
Here's the pièce de résistance?
The bill came so I grabbed for it to do the quick division. She never flinched or made a move in the direction of her wallet. So I said,
“I got it.”
To which she exclaimed,
As the monies were being exchanged, she mentioned she had been running late and didn't have time to stop at the ATM.
"Do you have cash for the valet ($14 + tip)? I'll take you home so you don't have to take a taxi."
What just happened here?
If I wasn’t so numb, I’d be pissed, but this is typical, and what it is like being friends with her, and why she is fodder.
I can confidently put a check mark next to “Took the high road.” (though it cost me about $75). I can be thankful for the friends that do care about me and know my kids. Most importantly, I can move on without guilt.
I’ve lost that lovin’ feeling and it’s gone, gone, gone, whoa-oa-o…
But it still makes me sad.