Gone Girl, The Movie: Toxic Marriages and Ben's Junk

screenrant.com

My birthday was Friday, and I have had an extended celebration, for no reason other than I had lots of plans and eager friends, that began on Friday afternoon and will culminate this afternoon with dinner at my parent’s house. “Part Two” of my birthday weekend included quite possibly the best surprise present a girl (me) with a crush on a guy (Ben Affleck) could possibly ask for (not really or at all, but it was a surprise, and I did find it interesting as I will openly admit). I saw, albeit for the briefest micro-second, Ben Affleck’s penis!

[Yes, I did. But so did the entire theater watching Gone Girl if eyes were quick enough and focused first on the shot of his very firm cheeks in the shower scene at the end of the movie. The camera panned around his waist to a frontal view. I am not providing a spoiler here. While I didn’t know about it prior to the movie as I didn’t read or see any promotional stuff, apparently he’s been talking about it in his interviews. He said, “You have to know that it was cold on the set. Very cold. It looks better in 3-D IMAX!” I thought it looked pretty darn, ahem, solid.]

My girlfriend missed Ben’s junk, though I blame it partially on the fact that she doesn’t have a crush on him. My husband also didn’t see it, no doubt due to the gorgeous and svelte blond, Ben’s movie wife Amy, rinsing off simultaneously under a shower spigot. My 23-year-old daughter did not miss it.

The first thing I said when we walked out of the movie was, “Welcome to cah-rayzie-town!!!”, then “I saw Ben’s penis!”

This movie is so twisted, but that you already knew if you’ve read the book. The book as well as the screen play are written by Gillian Flynn who is an amazingly talented writer (with a freaky mind to dream up this extravagantly detailed plot). The actors, particularly Rosemund Pike who plays the female lead Amy like an ice cube, carry off the plot almost impeccably. I would have liked to see a little more from crazy Amy’s point of view, but the book follows Nick’s timeline more so, and the movie follows suit. 

Questions posed at the beginning (and later), which are woven, if you think about it, and I did, throughout the entire movie that hold true, at least for me sometimes, when reflecting on a spouse or marriage:

“What are you thinking? How are you feeling? Who are you? What have we done to each other?”

Haven’t you thought about those questions a time or two?

Gone Girl chills to the bone. Both characters are despicable. They are toxic, and you will hate them. This movie is deliciously deep and dark like chocolate much too bitter! And I loved it

The Skeleton Twins: Movie Review

forbes.com

Since we are Catholic, mass “counts” for us if we go at 5:00pm on Saturdays. Never mind the loop hole sentiment, or screams of “Technicality!!!”, it works, and leaves us with Sunday mornings free. We often use them for movie dates. 

This morning, we saw a brand spanking new movie called The Skeleton Twins starring several traditionally hilarious actors like Kristen Wiig (my girl crush) and Bill Hader from SNL, Luke Wilson, and Ty Burrell (of Modern Family fame). Each is funny with impeccable comedic timing in most everything in which they star, just not in this movie. 

Don’t get me wrong, there are humorous exchanges and interactions. This movie is not about that though.

It is about siblings who were once close, grew apart, then are reunited under-less-than-desirable circumstances. It’s about trying to live your life. It’s about hurting, and hurting others. How parents, or other adults, can really fuck up kids in horrific, insensitive, and destructive ways by the decisions they make, or their actions, then it is up to those adult children to puzzle piece their lives back together again as best as they can. It’s about making mistakes, forgiving, and fucking up again. Try and wrap that up, and slap on a bow. Yet somehow, they share laughs. And we strangely laughed with them. 

The dialog was surprisingly intimate, and I felt like a “fly on the wall” observing these obviously sensitive and deeply connected siblings. They had an “us against the world” things going on. Though at one point, I was sick to my stomach, uncomfortable, with a strong desire to flee. Maybe I am being dramatic but it is how I felt for a brief time.

It is an intense movie with extremely strong, and disturbing subject matter. I don’t want to say too much so as not to spoil, but I found a review in Forbes magazine that describes it as “comedy and tragedy in perfect proportions”. In my opinion, the proportions are debatable (it was more dramatic to me), but there are both in this movie, and I highly recommend it (so long as you know there are trigger points in it as well).

So why did I stay? 

I stayed because I liked this film despite the bout(s) of nausea. Maybe because of it. Maybe I loved it. Yeah, I think I did.

Falling In Love Via The Airwaves

Typical Sundays for me happily include a complete reading of the “big” paper. And in the “big” paper today, there were two pages dedicated to the most anticipated movies for this holiday season including snippets of what they were about and who stars.

There was also an article interviewing Scarlett Johansson (who is not a favorite of mine) about her voice-only role in the movie "Her" (also staring Joaquin Phoenix and Amy Adams (who I do love)).

It’s about a man who falls in love with his newly purchased OS that is meant to meet his every need. Essentially he falls in love with a voice.

The concept of the movie was so interesting to me that I immediately searched for the trailer. I liked it very much. In fact, my eyes welled up. Then again, I cry much too easily and just about anything touching releases the flood gates (I’m not entirely sure if that’s a good or bad thing) so maybe I’m not an accurate barometer of such tender topics like love stories.

But it got me thinking. Could I, or anyone, actually fall in love with someone purely by their voice? Over the phone. Just by their words. Never seeing them in person.

Looking at it another way, could I, or anyone, fall in love with someone purely through emails? Black letters on a white screen.

Can they be considered viable lovers?

There is certainly the possibly of being more vulnerable. In this technological state, we’re liberated from any kind of judgment that other people might place on our appearance.

It's not as scary to say things (we'd say things we might well not in person), display certain emotions, through a DSL hookup. A little scarier over a telephone wire as there’s the “real time” element to it. But it’s downright frightening more often than not in person.

Hmmm. Then there’s the visual and physical elements. They’re missing, obviously. Biologically, we are made to see and touch (I’ll leave smell and taste out of it for today). We are visually stimulated by other human beings, also by animals, art, etc. We are warm and soft to the fingertips and lips. We crave these things, don’t we? I do.

And if we knew what the "other" person looked like but the interaction was still only through technology, would that change how we felt about them? 

Well, I certainly don’t have any answers. I was just thinking out loud.

Intouchables (The Movie) and I Told You So's...

I don’t have to be “right”. I don’t actually care if I am or even if no one notices or acknowledges it. I can keep the self-satisfaction to myself. I hate gloaters!

After 24 years as a wife and mother, I am a professional battle picker! I don’t often push hard for something that doesn’t really matter much to me. Like with family movie night, I’m the first to cave because I’d rather have us together snuggling under blankets than someone leaving the room in a huff.

So last night when movie negotiations began, I decided it was time to hold my ground and insisted we watch something I saw a few months ago called Intouchables (of course pronounced in the proper French way). I had a few reasons why I wanted them to see it, at this particular time, though one of which is that it's outstanding.

(They wanted to watch a soccer movie with Gerard Butler and Jessica Biel. Uh, uh!)

“What’s it about?” my daughter asked.

“Well, it’s a French movie about…” I replied.

“Don’t tell me it’s subtitled,” said my other half, stirring the pot.

“Yes. It’s subtitled but you won’t even notice it.”

“You don’t think we’ll notice that we are reading THE WHOLE THING?”

“Nope!”

“GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! I know I’m going to fall asleep,” added the college student.

Within 15 minutes, I heard the first chuckle. I smiled knowing no one would doze off any time soon.

Intouchables is a true story about an unlikely relationship that develops between a down on his luck ex-con from a difficult upbringing and an extremely wealthy wheelchair bound quadriplegic who requires full time care. They need each other.

It is oftentimes extremely touching and there are at least five scenes in which it is impossible not to laugh along with several opportunities to reflect on how even people with opposing personalities and lifestyles can and do often connect. Our basic need to rely on other people comes through too.

As the credits rolled after midnight and neither was remotely close to falling asleep, I asked the doubters what they thought.

“I really, really liked it. I'm glad we saw it,” said my husband.

“It was really funny but that could have been you, Mom,” solemnly added my daughter.

As much as I knew they'd like it, my daughter hit the nail on the head. That was the reason I insisted we watch it because it could have been our lives right now.

I never said, “I told you so or I knew I was right.”  

But it didn't stop me from smiling to myself knowing I was.

Or from subtly mentioning my "rightness" this morning!

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There is nothing more fun than hanging with the weekend Moonshiners over at Yeah Write. AND it is an especially special weekend as we whoop it up with Erica for her birthday! Hope you're having a good one, girl!!!! Come check it out!

Monday Listicles: Do You Know These?

Today’s Monday Listicles topic is 10 Movies. Or is it 10 Favorite Movies? Or 10 Favorite Movie Quotes? I do know what it is but I’ve decided to mush it together and, unfortunately, I have more than 10 quotes but they are from only 10 movies. Does that count?

These are some of my favorite movies and a few are “All Time” favorites.

Here you go and in no specific order of favoritism.

10 Favorite Movies And Their Best Quotes (IMO):

1. Airplane

 “Surely you can’t be serious.” "I am serious, and don't call me Shirley."

2. The Princess Bride

Inigo Montoya: “You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.”

The Man in Black: “You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.”

Prince Humperdinck: “Please consider me as an alternative to suicide.” (Great pick up line?)

Man in Black: “I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But for now, rest well and dream of large women.”

Inigo Montoya: “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” (In response to “Inconceivable”)

I think the Man in Black said all the best stuff!

3. When Harry Met Sally.

“I’ll have what she’s having”

4. SAY ANYTHING

“I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that.”

“One question: are you here 'cause you need someone, or 'cause you need me?... Forget it, I don't care.”

5. THE BREAKFAST CLUB

 “We're all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all.”

“Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did *was* wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...

...and an athlete...

...and a basket case...

...a princess...

...and a criminal...

Does that answer your question?... Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.”

6. THE WAY WE WERE

“When you love someone, from Roosevelt to me, you go deaf, dumb and blind.”

“Wouldn't it be lovely if we were old? We'd have survived all this. Everything thing would be easy and uncomplicated; the way it was when we were young.”

“Katie, it was never uncomplicated.”

“You never give up, do you?

“Only when I'm absolutely forced to. But I'm a very good loser...”

“Better than I am.”

“Well, I've had... more practice.”

7. SIXTEEN CANDLES

“That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call 'em something else.”

And anything Long Duk Dong says.

8. FERRIS BUELLER’S DAY OFF

“The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?"

“The 1961 Ferrari 250GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love, it is his passion.”

“It is his fault he didn't lock the garage.”

“If you're not over here in fifteen minutes, you can find a new best friend.”

“You've been saying that since the fifth grade.”

9. SOMEWHERE IN TIME

“Is it you? Is it?”

“The man of my dreams has almost faded now. The one I have created in my mind. The sort of man each woman dreams of, in the deepest and most secret reaches of her heart. I can almost see him now before me. What would I say to him if he were really here? "Forgive me. I have never known this feeling. I have lived without it all my life. Is it any wonder, then, I failed to recognise you? You, who brought it to me for the first time. Is there any way that I can tell you how my life has changed? Any way at all to let you know what sweetness you have given me? There is so much to say. I cannot find the words. Except for these: I love you". Such would I say to him if he were really here.”

“Have we ever met before?”

10. PITCH PERFECT

“What are you doing?”

“Horizontal running.”

“I have a feeling we should kiss. Is that a good feeling or an incorrect feeling?”

“Well... sometimes I have the feeling I can do crystal meth, but then I think, mmm... better not.”

I saw this for the second time this weekend and it’s so much funnier. The best lines come from Fat Amy.

SSOC: How I Spent Five Days Alone

Anything Jana says on Sunday is what we get to do. She says we can brain dump all we want as long as it’s only five minutes worth. I should probably focus, then, because I can think of more than that. I’m staying, purposely, away from the elections.

No topic. Unedited. Five minutes begins now:

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I’ve had the house to myself, life to myself, for the past five days and four nights. You'd have thought I’d have so much DONE in that stretch of time. Nada!

I don’t know about any of you but the more time I “think” I have, the more I flitter it away. Everything's put off until the very last split second so I can maximize my "wants" for the entire 4.75 days. Do you do this? 

So here's what I did/wanted to do with 4.75 days of alone time.

I saw six movies. Which also means I ate a whole gob of popcorn (stomach ache?). Four at the theater and two at home. Here’s a quick rating (thumbs up or down) for each*.

People Like Us- Two Thumbs way, way up! Loved it!

Moonrise Kingdom- One Thumb up, One thumb sideways…very quirky, occasionally a little too much even for me and even though I love quirky! You wouldn't believe everyone who is in this movie.

Argo- Two Thumbs more than enthusiastically pumped way up high. Stay thru the credits. Affleck, et al., were fantastic.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower- Two Thumbs up, with enthusiasm but wish certain parts didn’t seem over acted by Emma Watson who I did love in this. All kinds of emotions here. Of course tears from me.

Pitch Perfect- One Thumb up, One Thumb 45 degrees down-ish. Chick date night and this was perfect for us girls.

Seven Psychopaths- Two thumbs wanting to point straight up but shaky…It’s hilarious. You must like intensely dark humor (ME! ME!). Lot’s of fun if you like this stuff. I do!

I think I have time to squeeze in one more!

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*I cheated and added the movie photos outside the five minutes but of course you knew that.

Birthday Presents For Hubbies

It’s hubby’s birthday today! And he received a very timely and much desired present last night. The Chicago Stock Exchange is closed today because the NYSE is. New York doesn’t want any business transacted while it is dealing with Sandy!

Nothing, I mean NOTHING, makes my guy happier than not having to go into work.

What in the world will I do with him all day (and tomorrow for that matter because I overheard the exchange may be closed Tuesday as well)?

It is his birthday so that means we should do something fun; something he wants to do. Right? Hmmmmm…..

A movie! That’s what we’ll do. He loves popcorn (he doesn’t let me put fake butter on it though!) and the show. Maybe we’ll even see two in a row like we used to do when we were dating and newly married. But we will pay for both instead of doing the “other” thing we might have done when we were young and broke. We will pay, I promise!

[I loved being young and broke. We were tight and worked through a million things. Like vacations on the cheap; buying the condo of our dreams; eating out at great restaurants or going to two movies in a row; even buying diapers. In a lot of ways, even though things were tough, things were simpler and we were insanely happy. Does that make sense to you?]

And for his birthday dinner tonight?

Do I cook for him or take him to a great restaurant?

Be an apron only wearing chef or put on a hot outfit with black stockings to go out?

OR cook at home in hot outfit with black stockings?

I’ll have time to figure that out at the movies!