Friday Afternoon Thoughts and Reading or Thoughts About What I'm Reading.

So I'm right this minute reading a book. Actually, I set it down to write this. Well, that's obvious.

The thing is, I stopped to ponder Katrin's (the main character) number one worse fear. Here's some back story so you can understand my train of thought.

Katrin and Eric were married for forty or so years. Forever! Eric has died and it's devastating. In their attic, Eric kept carefully tied and bundled letters in duffle bags and a trunk for fifty years. Since way before he was married to his first wife or Katrin. I'm talking hundreds and hundreds of them. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but I don't think so.

Eric took a trip with his school chums to the south of France when they were young. Fun and adventure is lovely at any age, isn't it? Somehow, though I don't yet know why but I think for temporary lodging, he is steered towards a woman named Monique. You see, most of these letters, opened and unopened, to Eric are from her. And he did not discourage Katrin from reading them. In fact, he told her to. She's a writer of people, biographies of a sort. And writing about her husband through these letters may help in her grieving process, he thinks. As a matter of fact, the last story he was able to tell her was the beginning of the adventure that lead to the letters in the first place and he was so happy.

Back to Katrin's fear. She's begun translating Monique's letters (those opened by Eric) since they are in French. Her mind starts spinning.

What if Eric lived an intensely richer, more passionate life before their marriage? What if she didn't know him as well as she thought? Should she halt her efforts to learn more despite what she may come to learn?

She's NOT snooping. The material belongs to her now, but how much do we actually know about our loving spouse's life before us like their innermost thoughts and feelings about others? How much do we want to know?

How much do I know?

In turn, how much does he "really" know about my time before him? Certainly not every little bit of everything.

Sets my mind to spinning, too. Okay, I'm back to reading. I'll report back about what more I discover.

Random Thoughts Thursday: NaBloPoMo (Day...?)

When you decide to blog every day, there are going to be those where you are short on time, extremely busy and distracted.

Today is one of those days…

I heard a morsel of information this morning that I decided to take on faith. I am not going to “Google” or “Wiki” it so take the leap with me. 

Did you know that grasshoppers can only jump forward?  That means not sideways, or backwards. Be that grasshopper only moving forward. I like this. “Grasshoppers for $500 Alex”.

You know how I hate Costco, right? It’s not only the parking lot and crowds. Who doesn’t spend a freaking fortune on things they really don’t need? I ended up with a $210 bill when I only went in there for some pork tenderloin. I guess I needed a new puffy coat for this next Chicago winter. The Farmer’s Almanac says it’s going to be another doozy. 

I forgot to mention in my post about books yesterday that I am also listening to A Bollywood Affair. I’ll get back to you on the author. Little known fact about me… I love all things Bollywood especially the movies. This book, so far, is entertaining and light and exactly what I need for the car and walking to work.

Speaking of work, the fish need to be fed. And that’s my job.

Eat This!

Yep! It’s Sunday again. Truly can’t believe it. Yet one of the best things about blogging on a Sunday is knowing a place, Jana's Thinking Place, where I can throw my random or prompted stream of consciousness writing.

Fortunately for me, but maybe not so for you, I’m going rando!

Five minutes with my phone’s stopwatch set and then I will post without editing. Oh, lucky you!

************************************

I will start by saying that I love food. My tastes run the mill of just about anything except Cheetos. Not a fan. Also, I don’t care for anchovies unless they are chopped up itty bitty. Everything else pretty much goes down the hatch. Oh, but I wouldn’t even think of eating sweetbreads. I will add those.

AND I'm a card carrying member of the clean plate club, just so ya know!

So I had the great fortune to dine at a favorite spot for brunch today. It’s a rather newish restaurant in Chicago’s Little Italy (one year maybe?). It’s called Davanti Enoteca. If you are ever in our fair city, hit it up. Lunch, Dinner, whatever. It is outstanding. Italian tapas. I digress...

On the weekends, in the morning, they open up their street front giant doors and sell fresh homemade donuts. They are on display for anyone walking by.

Okay, this may indeed gross some of you out but I just HAD to have the donut of the day. Today’s donut!

It was a soft and plush yeast raised long john (so moist that you thought there might be some custard inside at first), glazed generously with maple frosting and lastly, and most importantly….

A way thick strip of applesmoked bacon.

It was just about one of the most delicious sensations I have ever eaten. Not kidding.

If you ever run across something that looks like this (arrow pointing down)….EAT IT! You will not be disappointed. 

Let's Be Friends, RV Travel, Name That Tune, Hands Out Of My Pocket!

Can’t believe it’s Tuesday. Again. And so quickly that happened.

The thing I like about Tuesdays is the opportunity to participate in Stacy’s Random Tuesday Thoughts and it provides just enough of an excuse for all this blah, blah, blah!

I’m not on Face Book much but I got a friend request (who knows when?) from a guy that messaged me first saying, “Hey, Gina. We went to college together. Do you remember me? Let’s be friends.” I looked at his picture. Didn’t ring any bells or jog any memories although his name is kind of familiar. He knows someone I know (mutual yet distant friend) but that’s just not enough on my end. Do you ignore the request? Obviously they know you are ignoring them when you don’t accept. But do I care that he knows? No, because I don’t know him. I knew I’d eventually answer my own question.

I love to drive and I could do it, by myself, for hours. And as I was driving home this morning from Indiana I had the opportunity to think about and do a few things.

(1)         I’d love to buy an RV (think “Lost In America”). One like the rock stars have but it doesn't have to be that pimped out. It can be basic but along these lines. I saw tons of them today. Ahhhhh! The freedom to travel. I have several specific uses in mind for MY  RV. I would take it to concerts all over the country. I’d see every band or artist that I ever wanted to see and I would enjoy both mapping out my trip and spontaneously seeing anyone of interest while also taking in our National Parks. This sounds perfect for me.

(2)         I like to drive by myself because my "in vehicle" music habits would drive the most insane person completely wacky. I don’t use an iPod or listen to CDs. I cruise the stations. NON-STOP!!! My finger is fixed to the station changer or tuner and I just roll with it. Sometimes I even play “Name That Tune” with myself and only leave a song on for a few notes, guess, then go back to the station to see if I was correct. Yes, I’m annoying but I am by myself so I can do what I want. Additionally, I have no problem singing at the top of my lungs and don’t care if people see me belting it out. I heard a lot of great songs this morning.

(3)         Part of any drive, I like to reserve for pure thinking time. I let my mind wander off without so much as a thought to reining it in. Stories formulate that way.

I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reading The Hunger Games and Catching Fire but me thinks I will take a break before reading Mockingjay. This must be influenced by hearing that it wasn’t as good as the other two, not sure, but my wandering and curious mind is already off in a new direction (Mockingjay will have to wait).

I’m starting a book called What The Psychic Told The Pilgrim by Jane Christmas. Have you heard of it? I hadn’t but it was given to me by my neighbor, the one with whom I went off to Spain, and it’s a must read for me. We will be walking Spain’s Camino de Santiago de Compostela for 30 days beginning towards the end of May with the culmination being June 27^th. If you’ve ever walked La Camino, please feel free to give advice or pointers. We will need them.

It lasted 13 days. I’m actually surprised it took them that long to ask about money. The kids, I mean. I usually get “hit up” sooner and more frequently. However, I did offer to pay for any date nights they had with each other…just the two of them since they attend the same school and live a mere four doors down from each other. You see…they don’t get along. AT ALL! One says “black” and the other simultaneously says “white”. ALWAYS! I want them to bond, to like each other and if it’s over sushi (their only shared love), then I’m willing to pay for it. I owe someone $30.

They sent a picture from that night, after dinner, and those smiles look real. I don't have many like that...one is always faking it! Plus it's confirmation they are ALIVE!

I need to get to the stairs. Remember "Storm The Stadium"? That stupid thing I said I'd do (6000 stairs in Soldier Field); the stupid goal I set for September 22nd. Thinking about them right now makes me want to puke.

Oh, and lastly, I would like to look like Jillian Michaels on the cover of September's Shape Magazine. 

I only have 6 inches, 20 lbs. and 12 years on her but...maybe? She looks great. Healthy. Strong. Fit. Just the right look to me!!!

Thanks again, Stacy, for hosting!!!

Toes, Cement, A Car Wreak, Extreme Fitness, Brain Cramps And MORE!!!

Have you ever wanted to stick your toes or a hand or write something with a stick in freshly laid cement? It definitely brings out the child in me.

This is my village this morning. 

Who the heck thinks we need to keep beautifying this one block town? Look at it! That’s all there is. But it’s in a constant state of rearranging on our taxpayer dollars.

I bring this up because you can see my coffee shop in the forefront. This morning, right outside, the cement mason was putting his final touches on a decorative circle before my eyes. The ONLY thing I could think of was taking off my flip-flops and digging my toes in. Leaving my mark. Childish, right?

My sensibility kicked in. I thought about the bill we’d receive from the village and the ‘splaining I’d have to do…

Speaking of ‘splaining…

It came to my attention this weekend (from my daughter), and as clever as I thought I’d been, my husband knows about a fender bender I may or may not have gotten in with her car recently. I immediately took it to “my guy” for a cheap repair (doesn’t everyone have a guy on hand for such things?) and had it fixed fairly well for 50 bucks. The alternative was a much more costly replaced wheel well and quarter panel. Plus it wasn’t on the driver’s side which is the side mostly seen from our driveway. I thought I made a good decision here. Funny, my husband has never mentioned a thing to me even though he has seen it, inspected it (no doubt), mentioned it to my daughter and knows who the culprit was. And he knows I know he's seen it. Patient man.

It’s been one week to the day since my little monsters left for school. Need I say more? AHHHHHHHHHHH…..

People who have been following me for the last 4-5 months know I get a bit wigged out over exercise. I always need to have a fitness goal or challenge dangling in front of me. If you live in the Chicago area, are going to be in the area OR want to be in the area and you like fitness challenges (Hey! Think along the lines of the writing challenges for which we are all so fond!), sign up for STORM THE STADIUM on September 22nd and do it with my friends and me!!! Check out the website. It should be a blast and I will be talking about it as it gets closer...A LOT! And it’s not about how fast you can do those 6000 stairs; it’s about just doing it. And who can resist a Survivor hunk or hunkette?

I love participating in Trifecta and Yeah Write writing challenges. However, I’m suffering from an extreme lack of ideas. Anyone out there have any suggestions for a writer’s brain cramp? Jack, I know you’ll say there is no such thing and to just keep writing and it takes practice and…

And I need sleep aids because I’m not doing it. Sleeping much. And I'm staying up way too late. And I’m thinking instead of sleeping. Counted back from 100 about 100 times last night and thought about Trifecta topic way too much. Sleep is overrated but I need just a little, pretty please!

I’ve been told the third book of The Hunger Games series isn’t as good as the first two. True? I should finish the series, don’t you think?

I always like to thank Stacy on Tuesdays for letting have a place to just be….Random!

And Seriously Shawn and Impulsive Addict for indulging our impulses to write whatever comes to mind.

And this is a train I’ve never been on before, Tuesday Train. I’m a nubee so I’m looking forward to an adventure.

Kids Need To Go Back To School: Random Tuesday

It’s Random Tuesday. I love Tuesdays for this very reason. I don't have to think too much and that's all good with me.

Right now, it’s early. The sun came up directly in the window with a clear path to my eyes. Looking down, I saw the computer exactly where I left it last night and began typing. Usually, someone would burst through my door after midnight, with his or her iPhone lit up, looking for it, waking me in the process.

I’m getting tired of getting woken up during the night. By someone doing something. Remember, I don’t have toddlers. No one should be waking up mom. And another thing! I’m tired of the shenanigans and the bickering. Again, I don’t have toddlers. I have young adults (who happen to never get along). Nothing heats me up faster, and not in a good way, then bickering kids!

It’s run its course, our summer together, in everyone’s eyes right about now.  By this time tomorrow, my house will be blissfully quiet but I'll have tears in my eyes, for sure. One leaves today and the other tomorrow. I absolutely love seeing their excitement for what this year holds. I LOVED college. I’d be excited to go back, too! Good luck with that "Introduction To Asian Religions" buddy. I'd enjoy it but I never pictured it to be in your wheel house!

Why is it when you are taking a shower, in one with a glass door, your husband finds about 5 reasons to keep coming in, asking questions, nose pressed to the door (or feels like it)? Then as soon as the glass fogs up, he gets on with his own business. Interesting.

I took a walk yesterday for the first time in 6 weeks. It felt great being in the sun and a cool 76 degrees. But I was huffing and puffing after the first half mile. After 1.5 miles, I threw in the soaking wet towel (ripped off the sweaty neck brace) and flopped down on the couch. I’ll go again today and a smidgeon farther.

What I realized during yesterday’s walk is I miss something very badly…my iPod. My music! For 30 minutes, I played most everything I wanted to hear! Just lovely!

Today will be another gorgeous day. I can tell from my window. But I think I’m going to close my eyes one more time and see what happens.

If This Isn't Random Enough, I'm Not Sure What To Say!

I can’t imagine that anything I write from this point further will be more random than the randomness that this post will turn out to be. Thanks, Stacy, for letting random be the norm and not just be considered bad writing. And Shawn for allowing us to get it all out at Talk To You Tuesdays.

To say that I am currently frustrated, which I mentioned yesterday, is an understatement. It’s been three weeks and I still really can’t go anywhere by myself, or do anything (nothing I want to do except read and write). When you contemplate all the things you “can’t” do that you “want” to do, you then want to do them all the more and that’s just plain frustrating. I’m not being ungrateful because I am grateful. I’m just being feeling sorry for myself and that’s not good and not like me. Snap the “H-E-double hockey sticks” out of it.

I am also extremely over caffeinated at the moment. Two large javas will do that to a girl and my fingers are flying. My mouth would be flying, too, if I had someone to talk with. My girlfriend stopped by (the one who brought the second large vessel of coffee) and I just about got on my knees, pulled at her clothing and begged her to stay with me. However, she brought  “devil dog” along and after tearing through my house with Addy for an hour both soaking wet, I’d had enough. Now I’m lonely again :-(

Why can’t I just push an “on” button for anything in this house and have that thing simply work? Turn on. I’m not techie by any stretch of the imagine but I have a definite knack for figuring things out  and I won't let this computer, Linksys, Mediacom modem SH$T get the better of me. But I also don’t feel like wasting hours on the phone jumping through hoops to get everything to work. So I picked up the phone and asked someone to help, to do it for me. Does all this technology, wireless stuff annoy anyone but me?

Thank God for ponytails. It’s the only thing I can physically do to my hair right now and I’m finding the style very freeing. Before 3 weeks ago, I can’t remember the last time I actually put my hair in one.

Do MRIs make anyone squeamish? Claustrophobic? I have another one this afternoon for a torn rotator cuff (this stupid accident really messed me up!). YUCK! I’m not either of those two things but there is something terribly creepy about being shoved in a tube, panic button in hand and no quick way out. I often wonder if anyone is really manning the booth they hide behind in the other room and if I did push the button or scream, would anyone be there to hear me? Today…I just might test it out.

I need to buy new eyelashes for the weekend. Never know when you might need them.

It’s not easy being off of pain meds. I’m not sure that needs any more explanation. Hopefully the nauseating pain in my shoulder and the results of the MRI will yield a new supply. I’m not addicted, I swear!

What’s good on the tube right now? I need things to watch, to occupy some time.

I’m so excited to be writing a ton. But I’m not reading very much. Rats! I need to really dive into The Hunger Games. I know I’ll get hooked and it’s just what I need but I can’t seem to settle my mind into reading. Writing seems to be working better for me.

I’m bored with myself.

I can’t believe my kids go back to school in less than one month. I’m just short of devastated about this. I’m a “touchy feely” mom and they indulge me, usually. I will miss this horribly! I guess my attentions will have to be directed elsewhere (begrudgedly?). Lucky man!

I swear it’s like my neck is in its own 24 hour a day personal hot sauna and it’s getting skinnier which is not a good thing I’m thinking. If my posture isn’t stellar in 6 more weeks of this, I’m going to be really P-O’d.

That must be random enough for Random Tuesdays, right?

This Is Random in It's Purist Form, TOTALLY!

There’s a lot going on here. I’m exhausted after our holiday weekend but I think the reason for this will be in another post entirely. I just have to be ready to write it. And I’m not ready today, at least not this morning. Maybe later.

I’m writing from my bed, all propped up with pillows, and the sun is coming up. Can you see it? There it is!

 (Not the best picture, but you get the idea, right?)

It rises directly into my window as it shines it’s morning beam down the length of the lake. And I love being woken by a stream of sunlight softly resting on my cheek. It's warmth rustling me out of slumber. 

This is probably my favorite time of day. The blissful time you float yourself awake. Ignoring it for as long as I can, acceptance begins to creep in but my eyes remain closed; closed for as long as I can without peeking. My brain starts to stir and I begin to think. Some of my best thoughts occur right at this very minute of the day; at the exact time my eyes struggle to open and I urge them to remain closed just a little while longer. And these thoughts, they run the gamut.

As you can tell, I milk this time of the day for all it’s worth. There’s no other like it, in my mind. I try to stay still for as long as my schedule (or everyone else’s) will allow.

This morning, the water is calm. And there’s a gentle breeze I can see moving the leaves in the massive ash tree in my yard (it's 15 feet around!). If I had to make a guess, I’d say it’s going to be another hot one. It has “the look”.

Not much on the agenda today, but there really hasn’t been lately with the exception of weekend visitors. I’m a little crabby because there’s no coffee yet and I could get up and make it but I don’t want to ruin this moment, quite yet. The words are flowing and I hate stopping them.

I can tell you that I’ve been writing all kinds of stuff lately. Just not stuff for here. And I should be or maybe not. I still need to, and want to, get to an award my friend, a.eye, over at “Shouldn’t Life Be More Than This?” gave me last week, The Liebster Blog Award. I will do that today (I really have had a good reason for not writing here lately, I promise.)

I was looking for book recommendations yesterday and happened to be with some of  my book fanatic college aged friends. It was a beautiful thing hearing three twenty-one year olds discuss books and the pros and cons of two series they had all read, The Hunger Games and A Song of Ice and Fire (Game of Thrones). They thoughtfully considered which series I, a book fanatic as well, would enjoy more and why. It is exactly the type of conversation I would love to have with anyone but to be having it with college kids, for some reason, felt really special to me. Okay, I’ve been sappy lately!!! I admit it.

They chose…..The Hunger Games for me. 

I was to begin last night but felt more like writing. So I wrote and I wrote and I wrote. Until close to 3:00am. So when the sun started throwing pebbles at my window early this morning because I had forgotten to draw the shade so I could sleep in a bit, it arrived a little sooner than I wanted. I started to write...very early.

Something you don’t know about me is that I spend some time writing romantic encounters. Of all kinds. And I really mean ALL kinds. Steamy ones are my favorite and a few of those kept me up last night. They just kept rolling off my mind and threw my finger tips.  To ignore them and not get them down in writing would be a waste or a shame, at the very least. They held me captive, I swear.

Okay, was that TMI? I hope not and if it was…so sorry! But I enjoy writing these, this way, and I do hope we all spend some time writing these kinds of stories. They’re fun! Fun for me.

Yes, you are free to call me weird if you want.

I suppose the coffee doesn’t make itself and I’m jonzin’.

I believe I will turn this random day into a purely writing day and when my fingers or my mind give up or need a break, I have The Hunger Games hungrily waiting in the wings for it’s pages to be caressed. Lay off the romance you say? NEVER!

Stacy's Random Thoughts

Talk To Us Tuesday

Do They Give Degrees In Procrastination?

“Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.”

John Lennon

I couldn’t agree more with what John had to say in this regard! I love it. I enjoy doing it alone. I most certainly love having company when doing it. To me, wasting time feels decedent; like a really fine piece of rich dark chocolate.

I’m doing it at this very minute, obviously!

The term most people would use to describe this phenomenon is:

Procrastination* (definition courtesy of Wikipedia) In accordance with Freud, humans do not prefer negative emotions and handing off a stressful task until a further date is enjoyable. The concept that humans work best under pressure provides additional enjoyment and motivation to postponing a task.[1]

If they gave out degrees (and I don’t know who “they” would be), I would certainly test out as a highly qualified candidate for a Ph.D. I am that good at it; it could scare me if I let it.

I don’t have one lazy bone in my body but I can always find something more appealing and pleasurable to do than whatever I must. I am that easily lead astray. Plus when crunch time comes, I’m all over it. The heat under my rear end at such times produces the most incredible multitasking functions and production. Is pressure under fire addicting and is it weird if it's enjoyed?

For instance, today I have a million and one things to do before people descend here for the weekend; things I should have on a To-Do list; things that should have been done over the last few days (like assemble two big things purchased yesterday from Bed, Bath and Beyond that I thought were of the open and pop up variety. Bummer. No plans to do it). Wait...I wasn't supposed to be here anyway! Therefore:

It’s hump day. You know what that means? I still have two more days until I’m really in trouble (I’m kidding. I don’t get in trouble). And I won't be stressin' about it either!

Instead, I find myself reading, writing (Hey! Today I wrote two handwritten letters to friends who enjoy them that way. That counts in the “good things” column!), talking, texting, anything and everything, etc.

(Don't know what this say about me)

Being completely truthful, I’m procrastinating even as I write this post due to my very best talent for which I might even be better. I’m voracious when it comes to it! Daydreaming.

Daydreaming (definition courtesy of Wikipedia) is a short-term detachment from one's immediate surroundings, during which a person's contact with reality is blurred and partially substituted by a visionary fantasy, especially one of happy, pleasant thoughts, hopes or ambitions, imagined as coming to pass, and experienced while awake.[1]

Maybe procrastinating and daydreaming go hand-in-hand. I can't be the only one out there who's like this, can I? Like-mined people UNITE! I’m going for a bike ride.

*I picked the definition I liked best, so what?