Tuesday, August 14, 2012

They Always Come Home

H-O-M-E. 

The sweetest four letter word in the world. Right?

And “home” means just about as many different things as there are people in this world.

For our family, it’s this red brick two-story place that holds all of our prized possessions.

Our memories.

Our photos.

Our holidays and birthday parties.

Where we’ve played games and cards, assembled puzzles, shared iPod playlists, and colored with crayons.

Snuggled watching movies, a stoked fire in the hearth.

Homework completed at the kitchen counter late at night; grumps waking for school the next day.

Bickering. To. No. End.

“Home” always has its arms open wide like a giant hug, doesn’t it?

And the definition changes when the kids go away to college.

Home then means:

“Is it okay that I brought my laundry with me?”

I say, “No problem! I’d love to wash five loads of filthy, stinky clothes for you and, hopefully, your sister brought home ten more! Because I LOVE LAUNDRY!”

And the can of worms is opened wide…

“Will there be leftovers for me to take back home?”

I say, “Of course there will be because I’m planning to cook all your favorite foods in abundance before your arrival. Actually, I’ve been preparing for days!”

“Thanks for dinner, Mom. What’s our plans for breakfast?”

AND “Can I have my friends over for a few hours, ‘cause I haven’t seen them in a long time? We’ll be quiet.”

“Can we go shopping? But if you don’t have time, I could just take the credit card.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you wanted to see me. I made plans. How ‘bout lunch tomorrow but after noon ‘cause I’ll need to sleep in…if that’s okay.”

When the weekend is over, squeezing them and nuzzling their necks, I think, “You smell sooooooo good.”

And your heart breaks when they say, “I have to be ‘home’ by 6:00. Can lunch please be early?”

Home means here.

Where I sit and wait for them.

Or so they think….

17 comments:

lumdog2012 said...

This so perfectly captures the conflict that we, as parents, face, when our kids go off and do their own thing. The same goes for the kids, they feel guilty but still feel the need to break away. The quotes were totally real! Great write.

Just Keepin It Real, Folks! said...

Wow, you made me weep a bit because in 2 years my oldest will be going away to college and I will facing some of these new challenges.

Anonymous said...

in another six months i'll finally be making the journey from home to my own place to live. but, even though my own place will be my new 'home', it'll never be the home i grew up in. <3

Anonymous said...

Sweet and funny at the same time. Well done.

Gina said...

It's such a push/pull thing with them. They want the closeness of our family together AND their independence and "own" lives simultaneously, it seems. Conflicting feelings, for sure! Oh, I've got those quotes down!

Thanks for liking, lumdog, and a public thank you for the mojo to write it!

Gina said...

You were a child bride if your oldest is not going away for two years! It's sad, at first, but then you become quite used to having your personal space again. The dimensions of every relationship are in flux.

And they're off........

Gina said...

It's never the same but you begin creating your "own" home and your "own" life until IT becomes where you truly consider home. And I'll add that it is not a physical structure. It's all about who's present.

Nothing like having your own place, though! Best of luck!

Gina said...

Thanks, Annabelle. They're exactly that...sweet and funny, at the same time (and I'll add pain in the rears while I'm at it!). Heart breaking when they start calling school "home" though.

Anonymous said...

It does kind of rip at your heart when your kids start referring to someplace else as home. I've got two in college... this resonated with me. Thanks for your comment on my "life long love affair" poem. :)

Gina said...

I LOVED your poem, Annette! I love reading about life long love affairs.

It does rip when they call school "home". I want to shake them and say, "But it's not. This is your home." I don't do it. They're gone now and I'm sipping a Diet Coke relishing a few moments of quiet.

Unknown said...

I remember those days well, and I have news for you this is whats in store in the next phase.

"I'm coming to visit with the kids for 2 weeks is that ok?"

or

" I have a couple of days off, maybe I'll come home for a visit."

No matter how long their gone..they always call it home.

Gina said...

And I LOVE it and I can't WAIT!!!

I know it will always be where they call home!

I'm so glad you're back from your travels. Can't wait to look at your pictures!

Jack said...

My son tells me that he doesn't plan on ever leaving home. Part of me kind of likes that, but it won't happen. For my sanity and his safety. ;_

Your post reminds me of the look on my mom's face when my middle sister and I used to leave. Eventually she got used to it and then it came back when we took the grandkids "home."

Anonymous said...

Home does transition. When I lived with my parents, I came and went as I wanted- just unlocked the door and went inside. Now, my home is the house I've lived in with my husband for fifteen years. When I go to my parents' house, I always ring the bell. I have a key but wouldn't use it :)

My older son is nearly ten and he talks about the house he's going to get so we can all live together. It's cute, but in a few years, he'll change and it kinda makes me sad.

Gina said...

My son used to say that too...that he wanted to live with me forever. It was sweet. Now...he couldn't have packed up his stuff to get out of here fast enough.

I'm a long way away from grandkids, pal. I know where you were going with that! Hee Hee!

Gina said...

You know what's funny? My mom has a key to my house and feels no such hesitation to come right in. She has scared the bejesus out of me a time or two. She swears she knocks first but I doubt that. I will walk right into my old "home" when the door is unlocked (of course, I've lost the key long ago so I couldn't let myself in)

It is kinda sad but it's the way its meant to be. They need to fly away and become independent. Believe me, they come back and hard charging!!!

Trifecta said...

It's funny how the perception of home changes. We go off to college or real life and when coming back say we're going home. But then when we leave the place we always called home we call the new destination home. It's a malleable concept.
Thanks for linking up. Be sure to come on back tomorrow for the new challenge.