Thursday, September 6, 2012

Wanderlust and When I Was Younger...

When I was younger, "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey played non-stop. It was on the radio and played at every party on every weekend when I was a 19 year old sophomore in college. I’d loved Journey since high school and this new song was just made for slow dancing. Or so it was to us!

Hearing this song now, reminds me of a dream I had all those years ago. And I’m not talking about a sleeping dream. It was an actual dream, much more than a daydream even. At 19, I was a spirited kid with a severe case of wanderlust. 

I wanted to travel.


I grew up in a family where education was a primary focus and money, at times, was an issue. My parents, two generations removed from the whole immigration thing, wanted to give my brother and I opportunities they never had. Like travel possibly?

Of course there was no doubt in my mind that they'd indulge my true desires and already made plans for the summer between my junior and senior year in college (well before the age of required internships and resume building).


So after careful thought and planning with two of my college girlfriends, we put together a rough itinerary for a two and a half month backpacking trip through Europe. The finances and costs were laid out (guesstimated of course). My friends already got their "Go!". I was the last one to approach “the parents” because, in reality, I knew what their answer would be.

“No.” It wasn’t even a wiggly "no". It was flat out "NO". Exclamation point added for emphasis!

As I’d had a history of doing, I pressed for solid reasons. I could debate even back then 'cause I thought I was soooo smart. Excessive pressing never worked or helped my causes. "No" always meant "no".

“It’s too dangerous for girls. We don’t know anyone who’s done that before. We don’t care if Cindy and Angela’s parents said ‘yes’. You don’t have money for that (but yes, I did). You’re not going.”

“But, but…..”  I stammered. And I had a long list of but this's and but that's!

My dream was squashed within moments.

The two of them, went on without me.

Fast forward 30 years…….

“Honey, you know my answer and I think you’ve laid out your facts well.  I can tell you girls have spent a lot of time getting your ducks in a row. And having the rough costs and itinerary mapped out is important. You know what you have to do now. And, no, I won’t ask for you.”

Even though it was an uphill push in this household for a short period of time ("I never did that when I was her age!" he said), I was even more excited when her dad called to tell her, “Yes. You can go.”

I’m thrilled my daughter will see her dream come to fruition and live my dream from 30 years ago. Backpacking in Europe for two month. Take lots of photos, girls!!!

While my wanderlust, especially for travel, still remains as intense and seductive as ever, I have new dreams. Wishes I’m trying to make happen right at this very minute.

I’m still spirited; just not a kid anymore if we are speaking in terms of chronological age, that is. And "No" is still a tough word for me to swallow.

I’m okay, now, with the answer I got so many years ago.

I'd have loved to go with three cool chicks “when I was younger…”

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2.) Write something that begins and ends with the words “When I was younger”. (inspired by writingfix.com)


Mama’s Losin’ It

14 comments:

Jerralea said...

Oh, I hope you still get to fulfill your dream ... well maybe not backpacking, but going to Europe!

Just Keepin It Real, Folks! said...

Isn't that what life is all about? Giving our precious children the opportunities we were denied? Little bastards!!!!

Gina said...

ROTFLMFAO!!! Little bastards is right but I usually prefer the word "shitheads". No not really...;-)

Gina said...

I have so much planned! During the time she is gone, I will be backpacking but in a completely different part of Europe and for a completely different purpose. Mine is intended to be a spiritual journey of sorts. Thanks for reading!

Madamdreamweaver said...

Nice story. I was in high school when that Journey song was to 40. Yeah, and hiking Europe was all the rage.

Gina said...

Both Europe and that song, back in my college years, were the "thing". I can still slow dance to the song and I've seen most of what I would have back then (only in really nice hotels instead of hostels) but to have done that trip that way....

Mimi N said...

I loved that same song, and now my boys love it. I'm so excited your daughter is able to go on this trip! How fun. I hope you get to fill that wanderlust of yours!

Gina said...

She loves it as well. It had a resurgence a year or two ago and she jams to it on her iPod as well! I'm very excited for her and I always do just fine filling my wanderlust for travel!

Thanks so much for coming by!

carol daniels said...

My dad always told me... "you can do and become anything you want to". I don't think he was thinking that backpacking in Europe as a teenager would be part of that! The lack of technology would have been the issue... thank goodness for cell phones! You won't need to worry as much as our parents would have. I think you are as brave as your daughter, or is it the other way around? Would be fun to hear how it goes, for both of you. Good luck!

Gina said...

And my dad always said, "Finish school. You need to make sure you can support yourself in the event that you have to do so."

Technology is so recent. Even those who traveled 15 years ago didn't have the same gadgets we have today. And thank goodness for Skype and Facetime and all the other methods for communication AND cell towers all over the place.

I've been encouraging her to do this since she was young. She's an independent, smart, tough cookie and they'll have so much fun. She's much more like her dad than her mom in that's she's very practical and careful. Thanks for visiting, Carol!

TMWHickman said...

Instead of backpacking, why don't you do a spa tour? It might be fun!

Gina said...

I've had the opportunity to spa a ton, wherever we vacation, and I'm appreciative of that. This is going to be something completely different, for me. I'm used to roughing it when I go to Honduras and this will be along those lines but over the course of 500 miles. For a whole bunch of reasons, I want to take this 30 day trek. Of course, I did find out there is a 5star hotel at the starting point in France. Nothing wrong with a night or two there before starting ;-)

lumdog2012 said...

Wow! I was touched by this story. Nicely written. I feel for your disappointment and now, joy, at the prospect of your daughter fulfilling that dream. I especially liked the part where Dad held back but then went along. Did he really have a chance with the pressure on him?

Gina said...

You are very perceptive. He really stood no chance. His darling daughter is very logical, practical, saved money for it and can state one hellava of a case for something. I'm thrilled for her and I'm taking my mom over there for the Rome, Amalfi Coast portion of it. My justification is to feed the poor college students and send their laundry out ;-)