Monday, March 11, 2013

Trifecta: Twenty-four Years


3:46 a.m.

My hazy gaze turns left for needless confirmation. The red LED numbers illuminate the same combination night after night. It's a real life version of Ground Hog Day, the movie, but it's a standing time they have, the one at which my body and mind choose to commune. Disturbing my peaceful slumber as wired toddlers do.

Eyelids remaining lightly closed and thoughts quickly, nimbly moving through my half-awake state, I've learned to embrace these hours like a frisky and persistent lover. There's nothing else to do but give in. 

In the not so long past, or so it seems, these moments were filled with nocturnal whispers. I fondly remember them as the solitary yet perfectly perfect quiet time two/too busy parents had to be "together".

Then the years blew away like a dandelion’s fluff in strong wind. They sprouted wings without asking who was prepared. And these night whispers became one-sided conversation inside my head. 

“What happened? Where's life going?”

But last night, it was different. Instead of looking towards the clock and grabbing my book, I inched over to the warmer side of the bed. Creeping within centimeters to feel his body heat, I watched his bare chest gently rise and fall. The movement was barely perceptible.

I began to whisper. Like I used to do in the dark. 

“Where did it go?

Twenty-four years.

Am I still as pretty… funny… smart... as I once was? To you.

Do you love me differently… better… more... after a quarter of a century?

Tell me.”

He rolled over pressing his good ear deep into the down. Lightly brushing my fingertips down the length of his spine, he stirred when I softly said (or maybe it was my hand), "Happy Anniversary, Honey." 

37 comments:

  1. Oh the changes. This is sweet and heartfelt. Here's to 24 more.

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    1. Change is the challenge. You aren't, can't be, the same people you were so long ago. What you hope happens is that your paths remain side by side especially through the tougher times (child rearing). You remind yourself daily why you chose this person and keep stoking the fires! But the snoring...thanks Renee!

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  2. This is a lovely little piece. It's a little sad too but I think there are twenty-four more years (or more!) ahead (:

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    1. Thanks, Draug! You look back and wonder "What the heck happened? How did it all go so fast?" That part is a little sad. I'm up a lot (see above) during the night and I don't have a quiet mind. My hubby is blessed with easy, rock-like sleeping unless I poke him. Pack your moments. You don't know how many you have.

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  3. So much love! So many terrific memories.

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    1. I can't even begin to remember every single terrific memory. Too, too many. The tough, bad, difficult times, even those more recent, fade quickly. The tremendous highs outweigh all else. Off for a glass of champagne by a lovely fire...and fish tacos, my favorite!

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  4. A nice reflective piece, and I can identify with sleepless nights remembering a time when someone very close didn't snore.

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    1. Thanks, Sandra! Sometimes I hand him the alarm clock, if its bad, and say skedaddle.

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  5. A cute little moment. Well captured!

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    1. I have a lot of cute moments during the night but the problem is no one is awake to see them ;-) Thanks, Joe.

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  6. This is really lovely, Gina. I know I said last weekend was the time for concrit, but if this were my piece (and it's not, so ignore the rest of this comment), I'd cut the last part. You've got something gorgeous and heartfelt and even difficult (his good ear is absolute perfection). I say don't go for the laugh about the snores and just leave it with the sleepy love.

    You write about love very, very well.

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    1. Thank you! You know I appreciate your feedback. I had debated for a while about where to leave the ending. It originally ended at Happy Anniversary. Thanks as always. I'm a sucker for constructive concrit!

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  7. 24 years! Damn, that's a long time. Going on ten this year for me. You captured perfectly how things change over time: "Then the years blew away like a dandelion’s fluff in strong wind. They sprouted wings without asking who was prepared." I feel like I'm never prepared. . .

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    1. Damn!!! It is a long time! But ten is long too. EVERYTHING changes and it's important that you change is similar or complementary ways. It goes so fast and we are NEVER prepared.

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  8. Love - I'm going to echo Jared's comment about the dandelion fluff - That was the terrific. And I love the...trying to think of the word...insecurity that a person can feel even after (despite) twenty-four years. Going on 21 and two are moving out. I get the dandelion completely

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    1. I wouldn't say insecurity. You talk all the time but you wonder sometimes. Have I changed too much from who I was? Do we look at each other the same way or differently yet better? So much growth happens and still happens even this very day. AND you have two moving out which changes EVERYTHING. It's fun but definitely different. You get back to remembering why you chose the person when you are alone again.

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  9. I love this story. Even though my marriage of even more years, did not last, I'm glad to see there are marriages where those feelings are still alive. Very poignant and well written, though I agree with Trifecta on the ending.

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    1. I know it is tough when marriages crumble. I am so excited for you though for your May date!!! Yes, we are lucky that after 1/4 century we still like each other (love is easier than liking sometimes). Thanks for your kind comments and I agree with Trifecta too ;-) But darn it! I'm still mad about the snoring but then again, I've got little things that annoy him too.

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  10. This was very sweet. There is something very comforting in being in such a long, committed relationship. Me and mine will celebrate 27 years this summer.

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    1. It is comforting. I look at him and still see the same red-headed, handsome and kind man I met and married so long ago. Not saying it's always easy though. I'm sure I can be challenging to live with as well. Congrats on your 27!!! That's awesome!

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  11. This was beautiful. I love the dandelion fluff - it does feel like the years go away just like that.

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    1. Thank you, Janna! It flies...time...

      And the older we get the go faster. The whole proportionate thing!

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  12. ahhhh, Gina. <3 Lovely, just lovely.

    Hubbymoose and I celebrate our 44th in May - we've both changed a lot. Yet, we still are the same. As are you and yours. Happy Anniversary. :)

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    1. Thank you Barbara! It means a lot to me that you think this is lovely.

      My biggest thing, ALWAYS, was for us never to feel like we were just roommates sharing a life. That there was "something" more always there. Yeaaaa for you two! I now understand what a crazy good accomplishment that is!!!

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  13. Beautifully tender; congratulations!

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    1. Thank you! Where does the time go? Almost feels like yesterday...

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  14. 24 years! Heavens! You deserve a medal. That is a lot of hard work, romance included. This was beautiful.

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    1. It is daily work. Doesn't just happen on it's own as you well know. Heavens is right!!! Thank you, Tina!!!

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  15. The hope of every young married couple should be that they grow together because growth is inevitable.

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    1. You hit the nail on the head, Jennifer. Change is the only sure thing in life. Changing together hasn't been hard. But child rearing has been the biggest challenge.

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  16. Love that it was your hand that said it! My best wishes, too, Gina! Sweetly reflective piece.

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    1. He is a man. They react to touch every time or so it seems. Now words...

      Thank you for your kind comment, kymm!

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  17. I read this earlier in the week but didn't have time to comment. I like this version much better. So tender and melancholy and filled with love. Lovely work, Gina. Congrats on the trifecta placement. Well-deserved!

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    1. Thanks, Stephanie. I greatly appreciate your comments. Made my Friday!!!

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