Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Trifecta: The Old Folks Home



Nothing ever changes at Miller’s Merry Manor. Certainly, nothing exciting ever happens.

The folks file in for supper at the same time every evening, 5:00, and sit at the very same table each and every time. Separate tables for guys and girls just like high school.

“He stares at me. At every meal. It’s not right.” Complains Yolanda.

“Maybe he wants your hot body.” Josephine rolls her eyes.

“What’d she say?” Yolanda leans over to Midge.

“She said, ‘He’s liked you ever since sophomore year when you did that musical together. Remember your hearing aids for dinner, dear.”

“Well, it’s rude. Doesn’t he realize I’m still grieving my Henry?”

“Henry died ten years ago. I think he’d approve of you being cordial to Robert. They were friends after all.”

“Robert was sweet on me, wasn’t he, all those years ago? But I had Henry. I don’t think I’ve lost my figure much either, do you?” Yola sighed.

“He’s not bad for 83. I’d entertain him,” Midge giggled.

“Then get busy. Maybe he’ll stop mooning over me. It’s becoming bothersome.”

After dinner, they progress to the television room for Wheel of Fortune, then reruns of The Golden Girls or whatever else plays on Channel Nine. The men follow staking out the card table for a few hands of gin rummy or a ballgame.

At precisely 8:00, they march down the drab gray halls of the town’s only state-run nursing home. Canes and walkers at the ready.

“Why does Robert always run out of here?” Josephine asks.

“He must have one of those enlarged prostates. Pees all the time.”

Yola opens her door.

“Damn woman! I know you can move a lot faster than that!” Robert shouts.

“I’m sorry darling. It’s important to me.”

Frisky, he pulls her onto the bed.

“It’s a bitch keeping up this sham. They gotta know a man wants what a man wants.  But you’re the best actress I know, sweetheart.”

Friday night. Not routine at all…for some seniors.


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33-333 words using the 3rd definition of:

1: the female of the dog or some other carnivorous mammals
2 a : a lewd or immoral woman
   b : a malicious, spiteful, or overbearing woman —sometimes used as a generalized term of abuse

32 comments:

  1. Frisky seniors... I love it. I like how she says she doesn't think she's lost her figure. That's great. My mother in law was like this in her 80's. Had an old friend of her husband's courting her, coming over every week or so. She provided a few too many details of the coupling, but I was happy for her. Nice writing, Gina!

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    1. I've heard there's a lot of "frisky" going on in those places. Good for them so long as it's not hurting anyone else. I hope when I'm 80, I still feel like a...I don't know what age but not that one.

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  2. This is great! It's nice to read a piece in which seniors are active and living their lives. I also love the name, "Miller's Merry Manor"!

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    1. That's the name of the local nursing home where I live in Indiana. We drive past it everyday and I only can imagine what goes on in there! I hope to be one of those "active" ones.

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  3. Hmm. I wasn't expecting that! Nice set up, nicely crafted story.

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    1. Well thanks, Kymm. I'm happy you weren't expecting that! I appreciate your comment.

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  4. Wow! Great story with a wonderful surpise ending. My parents are in assisted living and my 95 YO dad tells me stories about ladies hitting on him. He's not intersted (I think). The whole thing makes me squirm.

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    1. Thanks, lum. I'm glad you were surprised. I bet there are ladies hitting on those men. Women!!! I think it's funny. And I'd probably be squirmy too.

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  5. chuckle - Gina you surprise me - and delight me. :)

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    1. Awwwww....Thank you so much Barbara. Coming from you, particularly, makes me very pleased.

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  6. I love this. You have got something great going with these characters. My husband did a mediation with a senior's facility and learned all about the bed check. Sounds like there is a lot of hopping around from bed-to-bed if you know what I mean.

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    1. Thanks, Jamie! I'm now kind of fond of Yolanda and Robert as they lived in my brain a bit yesterday. Did you know that there's tons of STDs passed around those places? YUCK!

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  7. I love this story! My mom is director of development at a continuum care organization for seniors, and I am sending her this story right now. She'll love it!

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    1. So fun! I hope she does like it. It was fun to write. If the the word count were higher who knows what they'd be up to at 500 words!!! ;-)

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  8. Frisky at 83-how cute!Liked the wily Yolanda,pretending that Robert was bothersome & even asking Midge to "get busy",lol!Deliciously naughty;-)loved it Gina:-)

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    1. "Deliciously naughty" is my very favorite comment and so fun! Thank you so much Atreyee!

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  9. oh man does this bring up a hysterical story my dad shared with me once. he lives in a retirement community- mostly independant living but attached to a dependant living place.

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    1. I don't know why I thought of this but I did. I know stuff goes down in those places. Do share!

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  10. A nice break from routine lol

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  11. My grandmother once made a comment about how some of the ladies were providing more than just talk to the men who could still move at her retirement home.

    I pretended not to hear.

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    1. Those women! Sheesh! All over men all the time ;-)

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  12. This is great-I love that she's so worried about what her friends think, even at that age!

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    1. She is all worried that she doesn't, at 83, come off as trampy. A girl's gotta have some fun. And Yolanda's running out of time for that!

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  13. Loved that ending. . . wasn't sure what to expect. It's good to imagine that I (we) won't lose our sex drive when we're that age. Right!? :)

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