Saturday, October 31, 2015

Have You Ever?

(I am using the same picture as A Cup of Jo! because it's perfect!)

I follow a blog called A Cup of Jo for its fashion, design and travel tips, and honest and fun discussions on relationships. Girl stuff in general. I visit at least once a week or so. And as is so often the case with many blogs, some of the best action can sometimes be found in the comment section. Love it!

Yesterday, a post titled “Do You Stalk Your Ex Online?” caught my eye because…how could it not??? If I am honest right here and now, the answer to this question is a resounding “Of COURSE I have."

Go ahead and admit it; you have too.

In the old days, stalking was an inconspicuous drive by right before curfew, or a well-timed hang up after (hopefully) hearing his voice on the [GASP] home phone. I'm not talking about the scary kind that should be taken seriously, and which I am not making light of here. But the innocent, love sick sort. Stalking was pretty simple back then. 

Then some smarty pants developers had to ruin it all with the *69 callback function. And a few years later Caller ID. Darn those two telephone functions. They single handedly wiped out our once easy access to a former love bug’s “Hello. Hello. Hello?” [click]. The sound of their voice setting us back weeks. Maybe it was for our own good.

Now we have Google, and the wealth of information, both written and visual, it provides. Depending on how you look at it, it makes stalking both better and worse. Certainly more thorough. If one had the time and energy, some tech savvy to know how to properly dig, I bet you could find out more than you ever expected and maybe wanted. Am I right?

So that brings me to today.

After reading the post and more than a few of the comments, I decided for whom I wanted to stalk. I am not going to tell, but suffice it to say, I had a huge crush on this guy many, Many, MANY years ago. Thirty-one to be exact, and well before I met the man of my dreams. It lasted for quite some time too. We made out an obscene amount of times, but that's all. Wrote about him just once. (Go ahead. I’ll wait.)

Googling him procured most of what I already assumed. He’s still married to the (ugh!) girl he met when we were hanging out and good friends, lives in the same suburb in which he’s always lived, and has the same job. Oh, and a land line, and a Linkedin account (don't worry, I signed out of mine so he doesn't know). With a PICTURE!!! 

I didn’t recognize him. 

I read through his profile. It was him. I searched his face over and over and over looking for anything familar; a glimmer of the guy I remembered. 

I don’t like this stalking business. Not at all. It’s a memory spoiler.


  1. Love this post! Totally agree about missing the nostalgia of how people used to be and the fantasy of how they are now were it not for that damn Google & FB!

    1. Thanks so much! Some people you want to stay (unrealistically) exactly as you remembered. Frozen in time. Boy, it was sure easier to scope people out "in person" back then rather than virtually like today.

  2. This was such a great post! Super honest and relatable. I love cupofjo too!

    1. Thanks! It was really fun to write. Secretly, it was also fun to think and stalking and actually do it. Don't know what I expected to find; I guess the hottie who once was. C'est la vie!